Relationship, How to deal with the Pain of Rejection.

It is not always the case that people initiating a relationship will end up in one. As it begins, the initiators of relationships are in high expectation that all their attempts will be rewarded with acceptance. However it does not always work. But does it matter? Yes it does because the experience of the rejection determines how the subsequent relationships are going to be sustained. More over the pain resulting out of a' no answer' can be devastating hence the need to know how to deal with it.

It is important to understand first that rejection of a relationship initiation attempts affects the parties different. To the one being approached to begin a relationship, the rejection may at times be due to lack of readiness to begin one. To express this fact they may turn down the request. Another reason is dislike of the person probably based on genetics, character, physique or some other traits. In nut shell, the person turning down the offer, bases the rejection to some sort of judgment as compared to what he/she holds dear.

However, it is quite a different story for the one being rejected. At first, the initiator of the relationship will have gone through a challenging moment. To decide that it is time to offer the proposal, usually it will have taken days may be months of procrastination. Rejection automatically breeds pain. The pain results out of the person trying to understand without soliciting for advice the reasons for the rejection. Since the questions asked do not get answered, it breeds some a sense of anxiety that breeds stress. This is the stress that blurs rational judgment of the situation at hand and aggravates the pain. Rejection means that the persons being rejected may suffer from low esteem. Depending on how it is interpreted, it results to loss of will power to continue. When the will power is so diminished, the person may threaten to harm himself/herself in a bid to attract attention.

If one finds himself/herself going through this moment of pain what would be the best way forward?

• Stay Focused: The most important thing once you have been rejected is to know and determine that life must go on. This fact helps in building back the will power that is crucial in life at such a moment.
• Give yourself time: Up to the day one person requests the other for a relationship the period is characterized by immense emotional tension, fatigue, anxiety and uncertainty. But these realities are usually ignored all together but do weigh down on the person proposing. When rejection comes, consider giving yourself time for emotional rest. This would help regain the lost energy needed to move on.
• Find a confidant: Rejections in relationships are not unique. Usually many people will have faced rejection on their first proposals. It is important in the healing process to know that you are not the only being rejected, other people have. So find a confidant or a friend who has a stable relationship and share out your experience. Such sharing may prove very therapeutic at the end.
• Do not give up: It is easy to overcome the pain once you know you can succeed tomorrow. Today's failures could just be a small mark in a long journey of success ahead. So decide that you are going to move on and that you are going to propose to one who won't turn down your request.